Melanie and Tony. Day 10.

“Comparison is the thief of joy; vulnerability is the root.”

 

Melanie


1. Tell us about today. How is your bae doing?

Today was a facetime day, and I didn't talk to him until the very end of the day. He reported a very boring day at work and didn't seem like he had much else going on. He also said he had some vulnerability aftershocks from all our talks yesterday, so he felt weird today. I felt pretty opposite because today I felt very calm and not agitated at all, so it's almost like our weird feelings just exchanged places.

I do worry that my comfort may be at his expense. But we also agreed to not be in charge of the other person's feelings yesterday. So I hope he gets on the other side of this, knowing that I always have. I did work extra hard today to share vulnerable things with him (my goal from yesterday), but it seemed like it didn't fill his hopes of connection.

This could all be misconstrued since we weren't in the same space and emotions can be hard to detect over technology. He did express that he doesn't want me to be vulnerable out of duty, so I tried to share as much of myself as I could, but I'll clarify with him tomorrow why I'm being vulnerable. If it still feels unnatural to him, I can't control that.

2. HAPPY DAY TEN! In ten words (or less, we ain’t stingy), sum up what you’ve learned so far.

Comparison is the thief of joy; vulnerability is the root.

3. Scale from 1-10 how would you rate your chemistry? 7.5

4. Gif or meme to represent your feelings

Feeling colors of the wind calm, but not like Gorgeous Pocahontas, more like wind machine Melissa McCarthy. Like, I just know an otter is about to fly in my face.




 

Tony

1. Tell us about today. How is your bae doing?

We didn’t see each other today, but we talked on the phone. Melanie said she is doing really well today. I think some things got resolved for her yesterday during our relationship coaching and subsequent conversations, so I feel like her heart is more at ease now. She told me about a past relationship that was very formative in how she views relationships now. It was good to start filling in the pieces of who she is and how she came to be the woman that she is today.

2. HAPPY DAY TEN! In ten words (or less, we ain’t stingy), sum up what you’ve learned so far.

Vulnerability can be uncomfortable, but it is definitely worth it.

3. Scale from 1-10 how would you rate your chemistry?

I think I am at an 8 with Mel right now. I look forward to seeing her and when we are together I really enjoy it! Especially yesterday. I felt like there was a bit more spark than usual because we had been so open and honest with each other.

4. Gif or meme to represent your feelings

day10-emotions.gif