John and Jane. Day 4.

 
 
 

John

Tell us about today!

We went and got Nielsens Frozen Custard.

What did you learn about them? What did you learn about yourself?

Jane told me about her family, how many siblings she has etc.  We were able to have in depth conversation and felt that the relationship was growing and progressing. I see potential for this relationship.

On a scale from 1-10 how would you rate your time together today?

Seven. It was fun, we had good conversation and it was great.

On a scale from 1-10 how positively do you feel about your relationship at this point?

Six. I think we have chemistry. I really enjoy my time with her.

How are you feeling about this experiment?

I’m enjoying the experiment. It’s fun to get to know someone.

On a scale from 1-10 how would you rate your chemistry with him/her?

Seven.





Jane

Tell us about today!

John picked me up and we got a treat and chatted in the car for a while.

What did you learn about them? What did you learn about yourself?

I learned that John is really open minded and very ambitious, but in a quiet way. I really admire that his time and effort into things that most people don't take the time to do/learn. I learned about his family and how he feels about different things. I learned about myself that I'm actually maybe not that good at getting to know someone on a deep level as quickly as I would like to.

On a scale from 1-10 how would you rate your time together today?

Seven. It was just nice to sit and chat with someone about new topics and have a fresh perspective.

On a scale from 1-10 how positively do you feel about your relationship at this point?

Five. Neutral still.

How are you feeling about this experiment? 

I feel like maybe this experiment isn't so much about actually if personalities match, like maybe that doesn't really matter at all. I think it's more about having common interests and bonds. But also even further than that, about supporting each other in their interests. I don't exactly know how I feel about this experiment. Some hours of the day it doesn't feel like I'm participating in it at all, like I remember half way through the day "oh I should text my boyfriend to make plans because we have to see each other." HONESTLY, it feels like I just got another part time job, that's what it feels like tbh. Not in a bad way but it is just like a to do list item for me right now, not that I don't love being around John.

On a scale from 1-10 how would you rate your chemistry with him/her?

Three.

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Other thoughts?

Honestly, there are some things that are very hard for me to get past. And I'm looking at them in this experiment differently than in a normal dating situation so I can see what I feel after it's over. John and I are on pretty opposite ends of the spectrum when it comes to traveling and how we would do it and also things like hiking vs going to the pool and relaxing. This sounds so stupid, but being outside and traveling are two of my most favorite things of life, and take up most of my weekends and free time.

So I think, okay...say we really did date. How would I balance that? Because if I was just going on dates with John in real life I would be like eh we are better off as friends after hearing those things, and would never rethink the situation. So are these things actually not important when deciding if I could date him or are they valid concerns and are they really as important as it feels?

I'm sure everyone has things like that when dating that cause them to instantly write people off. But after just talking tonight a part of me wonders, will I just get so used to seeing John everyday and knowing this is what we have to do that in a few weeks I'll MISS that connection and interaction and naturally want it? And does that mean I miss the human or do I just miss the connection?

Can we be so committed that it doesn't matter the differences, the flaws, the disconnects, that we just strip it down to a level of human to human connection and care that we all crave and want badly naturally?

This is all jumbled, and probably doesn't make any sense. But hopefully it made a little bit of sense at least.




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John and Jane30 Day Bae Team