Alicia and Brice. Day 21.

“It was a bit of a wet blanket.”

 

Alicia


1. Describe what you did today in 3 words. Expound on why you chose them.

Work - because I worked today and that took up like half my day.

Social - my stake had a retreat and I got to chat with so many people, which I loved! I had invited Brice, but he said something along the lines of how he doesn't want to be around that many people.

Shirking - I texted Brice twice, he texted me once, and then he fell asleep. I feel kind of guilty, but after relationship coaching yesterday, I feel a bit avoidant, tired, and done.

2. Pop quiz time: What is your bae’s favorite vacation they’ve ever been on? What were they like as a kid?

The favorite vacation he has been on...hmmmm. He doesn't go on vacations much. He mentioned going on road trips with his brother, it seems like he would enjoy that.

As a kid I think he was quite serious. He said that he would go to school, go to practice, and go home and work on stuff. He said that he didn't really spend time with friends outside of school and practice. I mean, he wanted to get his PhD in 5th grade, sounds like a pretty serious kind of kid.

3. On a scale of “Wish They Were Never Born” to “Will Name All My Children After Them” how do you feel about the TDB team at this point?

Hahaha! Well, I love all of them! And I'm not going to have six kids, because woah, I'm too old and that's too many kids. I wouldn't want to leave anyone out from not having a kid named after them. And I'm just going to leave this as my evasive answer.

4. What did you learn about your bae today?

I learned that he worked today...and that he fell asleep before 11:45pm. Mind blowing new information.

5. What’s been on your mind today?

How to keep this up for another nine days without having the mindset of just "grin and bear it." I also have been thinking how often great people don't think they are great. Another thought I had was about how I feel like I can easily like someone and want to be with them in a relationship. I don't think this is an "exclusive to Alicia" thing and wonder how many people we push away thinking we wouldn't get along with them in a dating relationship. 

 

Brice


1. Describe what you did today in 3 words. Expound on why you chose them.

Dissertation. Work. Pizza.

I worked on my dissertation so I could get my prospectus ready to defend in a couple week. I worked as is normal. And then I got pizza with a friend. Alicia went to a stake retreat up the canyon. We tried texting when she was on her way back, but I'm assuming she didn't have great service and it was late so I fell asleep. It was a little strange not talking to her (a few text messages don't really count in my book) since we've been talking to each other every day for the last 20 days.

2. Pop quiz time: What is your bae’s favorite vacation they’ve ever been on? What were they like as a kid?

That has not come up in conversation. Haha

That has not come up in conversation. Haha

3. On a scale of “Wish They Were Never Born” to “Will Name All My Children After Them” how do you feel about the TDB team at this point?

I think the team is great and really supportive! I think this experiment is really good at helping others grow and learn about themselves. So I think it's awesome that you guys organize this. It's even better that you try to get the word out to others so they can learn vicariously through our experiences. Hopefully it's useful to some. I know it's definitely helped start the conversation within my circle of friends.

4. What did you learn about your bae today?

That she likes to go to stake retreats and other social Church activities. I'm not about that life, maybe because I didn't grow up with it. 

5. What’s been on your mind today?

I think part of the reason there has been radio silence today is because of relationship coaching last night. It was good that we got our thoughts out, but it was a bit of a wet blanket.

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I think it was needed to have a little space and think about where things are and what we want out of the rest of the experiment. It is a little hard though, because I feel like Alicia is a bit disappointed that things aren't working out swimmingly. Since we're in this together, part of that falls back on me. There's probably a lot we could do to meet each other's needs better, but we're kind of in a weird spot that makes it difficult to want to do that. Oof. Relationships are hard.